Daddy’s Strong Girl


Every morning for the past 2 days, I wake up and feel so fresh;
And then, the reality hits like a heavy slap on my face.
That void feeling, vagueness, numbness, and emptiness is all I could feel.
It will get better, they said; it’s only getting worse each passing day.
When people ask, “how are you?” I say, “Okay,” but deep down there there is just a blank feeling.
“Cry out loud,” friends said, “Why isn’t she crying?” relatives gossiped.
Only if you are sad, you cry; when you are empty, you can’t cry.
Legal works and rituals kept me occupied; All I thought about was to make this tragedy a little less saddening for others.
Somewhere down there, this strength & emptiness etched my soul forever.
When I did question myself how it’s going to be without one of the parents, someone called on my phone to give condolences and asked, “Am I speaking with Ms. Indrasenan?”

He is there! Forever in my name, and deep inside beyond all that scared, scarred, void soul of mine.

I never said it to you; I always looked up to you, dad! I wished I expressed it more. I was never daddy’s little girl, that is always my sister. I was, am, and will always be your strong girl, just like how you wanted me to be.

~Ms. Indrasenan

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20 thoughts on “Daddy’s Strong Girl

  1. creatikaa says:

    The emptiness and pain would get better or vanish, it’s going to stay forever and may be get worse. Crying really doesn’t help and there is going to be that empty forever. But as you said the first daughters are always the daddy’s strong girls! your going to be stronger and harder! πŸ™‚
    Divya Srinivasan

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  2. nisha tiwari says:

    I can understand your feelings and thoughts. Though we fight and criticize our fathers at times, when they are there it is a feel of being secure. They only can love us and care for us no matter how we are and what we do for them in return. Yes being sad or depressed doesn’t mean that one should keep crying. I understand that empty feeling which you are talking abt. Be strong like this and make your father feel proud.

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  3. Nirosha says:

    Dad’s presence will always be with you. Words wouldn’t do justice to express how it feels loosing a loved one 😦 , stay strong dear. #hugs

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  4. dataylor43 says:

    I’m so sorry for your loss. I understand your pain. My dad passed in January. My mom told me the night he passed, they say it’s gets easier with time, but for my mom (67 yrs old, lost her dad in 1995) she said it only gets harder for her. I must say, I agree with my mom. The pain seems harder each day for me. It’s an indescribable pain.

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  5. mramani says:

    Dear Sri,

    Wherever he is now, he is looking after you and is proud of your courage and calm.

    Time will heal wounds. Take care.

    Prayers,
    Mahesh

    Like

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