Why Desi Break Ups are more painful? – Freestyle Fridays 8

Hi Folks,


Relationship – Oh Crap!

For past few weeks all I see around are break-ups, rough patches, complicated relationships, cheating, betrayal and ditching. So here I am writing about why break-ups are so painful especially in India. If you are going to tell me that your love is perfectly a fairy tale or that everything is always in place in your relationship then I am happy for you, you guys are the modern Prince Charming – Cinderella so get yourself and your bf/gf a chocolate and go and write your fairy tale. This is for those who think their relationship is in a rough patch or those who thing relationship has ended.

Let me start with the title “Why Desi Break Ups are more painful?” – Precisely, why are the desi (Indian) break-ups painful? The answer is simple because Indian love stories are dramatic. Here are set of differences between a desi and non desi romance and break up.

  1. In India, we love a friend, acquaintance, friend’s sibling, neighbor, social media friend, and classmate so we THINK we know about them, thus we move forward straightly to love after the first date or proposal. However, gradually when we come to know of their true nature (believe me it is lot more different than what we THOUGHT), likes and dislikes we start to drift apart and feel ditched and painful while the true fact is that we didn’t understand them in the first place.
  2. Here love is struck together with the marriage tag. We love a guy/girl we start imagining our life, marriage, kids and even kids name with them thus when we break up it is painful.
  3. Indian couples tend to spend every waken moment over the phone, sms, whatsapp, etc with their bf/gf. This way we will feel so painful when they break up and stop texting us. The reality is we are missing texting them and not them.
  4. Social life seizes when we start going with gf/bf – Again when we fall in love, we avoid our best friends, spends hours together on call, messages or roaming with them. We become discreet gradually our friends stop inviting us to meets and once we break up we feel as if no one is there for us and we feel all alone.
  5. What will others think? :O This is the biggest culprit in making us devastated if we are in relationship for more than a year or so we will feel bad after break up that what will others say, how will they treat me, wouldn’t they say that “how can he/she break up after such a long affair”. On the contrary if the relationship breaks in months we will feel sad that what might others say about ending an affair so soon or “He/She can’t keep a relationship for one year also”. Here we give importance to the society more than our own wishes and desires thus ending up in pain.

Is there a solution to this? Well, if you are in break-up stage or rough patch or in a complicated relationship then you might not take prevention or precaution but there is definitely cure which will be posted soon. As of people who want to fall in love or in verge of falling in love; just remember not to do these 5 mistakes because if at all your love breaks up you might feel less miserable if you avoid these 5 mistakes at starting stages.

Break-ups are one of the never ending topics and I would come up with more on this topic and other topics in the forthcoming weeks. Stay Tuned to Freestyle Fridays on more Relationship Issues.

Love & Cheers,


I am S(t)ri



  1. Interesting manifestation sri. Just to add flavour, I feel guys(desi) get more bulldozed than their female counterparts. The 6th point I would like to add is how a guy or girl embraces the changes that occur over their relationship stint.. This indeed is the toughest hurdle in most relation LPPships . Resistance to changes causes fizzles..


    • Vijay after seeing me too you feel that girls don’t feel sad? Anyways I second you I have seen more guys suffer, either the girls grow past all the sufferings or they suffer in silence (I am not sure). Yeah as of the sixth point yeah, the changes affect not just love but break-ups also.


  2. I beg to differ. The pain is the same for a desi or a non-desi. I haven’t seen a desi brood over break more than a non-desi. Maybe their way of brooding over could be different. But the intensity is the same. Love is an inherent universal feeling. When a romantic relationship comes to an end it does hurt and break us apart. Regardless of whichever country, culture, religion and gender we may belong to.



    • I respect your opinion, however it is a well-known fact that marriage is tagged with love only in India and it’s neighboring countries and not in the west. So apparently although break-ups are painful everywhere it is mostly in India that people find it hard to move on. My opinion!


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